The Truth About Cougars and Young Bucks

A lot of professional quack psychologists and "investigative reporters" will tell the public and anybody dumb enough to believe them that all young men are attracted to older women because older women are more mature, confident, and powerful, but we all know this ain't so. Some older women act just as youthful as some of these younger women. And those "old babes" date younger men regularly.

Those "experts" also try to convince the public that a relationship between a younger man and an older woman (or vice versa) has a slim chance of success. All relationships these days have a slim chance of success. Look at the divorce rate. Surf the Net and take a look at how many people are suffering from relationship problems. Watch TV and talk shows and check out how many "normal" couples there are dealing with relationship issues and drama. NO RELATIONSHIP is completely safe from failure.

The truth is: Each man has his own reasons for dating older women just as young women have their own reasons for dating older men. The attraction may be physical, financial, emotional, intrigue, a fetish, a fantasy, he didn't realize she was older because she looked so young. Who knows what the reason is besides the guy who's trying to gain the cougar's interest. An older woman might peak a young man's interest simply because he loves women - or sex. Hell, he may be lonely. Maybe he wants to settle down. Or... He may not have an age preference. Who knows? Sometimes an older woman will flirt with a younger man and seduce HIM. It happens.

Cougars do "grown-up" sh*t. They surprise the man and provide him with an experience he's not used to with younger women. They know how to TREAT a man, CATER to him, STROKE his ego, and make him feel like a King - or at least like he's important or special. An older woman will have his nose WIDE OPEN just on her social graces alone before he knows what hit him!

(And before he knows it, he's living in her house with her and her kids playing the role of a "40-something year-old celibate husband/handyman" - with a honey-doo list a mile long. That happens too.)

But many young men - probably most - aren't going to be attracted to an older woman if she ain't pretty (or cute) and has a hot body, style, or some kind of sex-appeal (physically or by way of her personality, but usually physically). A guy may be out at a club "getting his party on", drinking, and see a fine-looking cougar in the midst of a lot of hot chicks - and she's sexy as hell and smelling good - and BAM! It's love at first site! Every woman has a unique quality, true. But, as far as most guys are concerned, older women have to have the same "good" qualities and features as younger women. It might be a pretty smile, a cute hairstyle, a cute butt, nice legs, good health, a sexy dancer, whatever... She has to have SOMETHING that turns him on. But, even then, many of those guys aren't thinking about a LONG TERM relationship. It MAY end up turning into a long term relationship if the two have a lot in common or if he sees something in her he can't resist, but MANY of those young bucks are just curious (sexually or mentally) and just want to have some fun with a sexy "experienced woman".

It's true that some "young bucks" admire powerful women. But many men and women admire powerful people. So it's nothing unique to younger men and older women. Successful people are intriguing that's why we watch them on talk shows, read their biographies, tune-in to listen to them speak or give their opinions, or desire them as mentors.

But the woman doesn't have to be in a powerful position. It's the woman's confidence and swagger that turns the man on. It's the mystery that makes him want to be with her. Some want to "conquer" the woman and make her fall in love. Some want to BE conquered and dominated by her. Some just want to know what she's really like personally. But even then, the strong confident woman could be young OR older. It doesn't matter.

Some young bucks date older women for personal development and experience. They like older women because they're "lost" (in life) and looking for a strong supportive woman (maybe a mentor). The younger guy isn't immature in the sense that he's playful and acts like a 15 year-old. He's immature in experience. He's a late-bloomer. These guys are looking for someone who can help them focus and find their "direction", purpose, or a path in life. They want a woman who can mold them into a man with the tools they need to be successful. They're looking for that "ride or die" chick (the "Bonnie" to their "Clyde") in an older woman. They already know the woman has experience. More than likely she's settled and done with partying and playing the field. So, the younger man feels the woman might be supportive, fearless, honest, less likely to cheat, and able to give him guidance, motivation, and opinions that will help him reach his goals. He believes almost all older women possess these qualities - the qualities of a strong positive woman. A True Diva.

One of the reasons why many of those relationships don't work is because the young man is not ready for "The Real World". He's not ready for all of the responsibilities or baggage that comes with being with this woman. The woman's mind is focused on many things that the man hasn't experienced, anticipated, and/or really isn't concerned about at this point in his life:

the children's schooling and education,
shopping for food, cooking, and having healthy meals,
sick and aging parents,
worrying about a sibling's, child's, or best friend's problems and dilemmas,
soap operas,
issues at work or surrounding her career,
bills,
her health issues,
things that need to be done around the house BESIDES clean-up,
her church group or some social club she has dedicated her life to,
duties/actions that he - as a man - is supposed to KNOW (or anticipate) WITHOUT HER TELLING HIM,
All kinds of sh*t.

And that's just the background to all the TIME he must spend TALKING about all of this stuff or listening to her rant and/or whine about it. (When your friend gets married and you rarely hear from him or see him, this is why he's "Missing In Action".) Most young bucks ain't ready for all that! And that's still just the tip of the iceburg.

Plus, if the woman is demanding or EXPECTS him to be there to support her and help her deal with all of this stuff, that's more pressure on the younger man - especially since he probably still wants to get out of the house every now and then to enjoy his youth. Eventually, she'll kick him to the curb if he can't keep up OR he'll bail out if she has too much going on in her life. That's why some of those cougar-cub relationships don't work. (It can also be the reason why "normal" relationships don't work.)

Another obvious reason why some of those cougar-cub relationships don't work out is because some men just aren't ready (or don't WANT) to be in a committed relationship. He likes the woman but he doesn't want anything serious. And some cougars feel the same way. Many of them don't want to be "tied down" either - because of their career, or they just want to date, or they have trust issues, or they have too much going on in their lives for a commitment, or Whatever. Every situation and reason for splitting-up is unique just as every reason for hooking-up is unique.

Don't listen to those quacks and their theories or you might miss out on love. If you want to date a younger man or woman, go for it. If you want to date an older man or woman, go for it. You have about as much chance for success (or failure) as any other couple. The keys are compatibility, goals, and your willingness to make the relationship work. And those are the same keys to success as any other relationship.