Finding Love In The Workplace

Do you think it's a good idea to get involved with a co-worker?

If you don't, you're not alone...

Most of the people I know would say "Heeell naw. I'd never hook-up with anyone from work." But, many people still do it, don't they?

One of my old supervisors once told me, "Boy, Never get your two "P"s from the same place." That's your paycheck and your...... well, you know.

I've never followed that rule.

If I see a fine-ass single co-worker - and she's giving me "the eye" - I'm going in. Why not. No one can predict whether the relationship will be a success or failure. And who knows, that person you're working side-by-side with may be your Soulmate. You don't know if he (or she) IS or ISN'T until you get to know this little cutie-pie. That's a fact no matter WHERE you meet each other.

Hell, if the guy or girl is looking good and smelling good all the time, and has a nice personality, SOMEbody is gonna make a move and ask him or her out on date - then, YOU might miss out on a good thing.

If he or she is showing interest, why not make a move?

At my last job, there were people dating, hooking up, married couples, and flirting going on all over the place. At my current job - it's the same thing. Every place I've worked has had people who were involved in one way or the other. With Supervisors getting in on the action too.

Let's face it, there are a LOT of lonely people out there - And people looking for Love. And, if those people aren't getting the love and affection they need at home or making a "love connection" in bars, on the Net, out in public, or through family and friends, they might end up making a connection at work.

Your job is like your second home and your co-workers are like your second family - or at least, distant relatives. These people may have a FEW things in common with you - or some interesting stories, or good advice.

Some of these people we talk to about our problems, or their problems, or drama in our relationship or marriage, or bad days, or traffic. Or, you share jokes with some of these people, stories about your kids, stories about your past, places to find bargains, news of the day, or stories and issues about screwball customers, lazy co-workers, and sorry-ass supervisors.

And let's face it, work can be boring. So, people tease each other, flirt, help each other once and a while.

These things bring people closer together in one way or the other.

But, there is a downside also. Some people are perverts. Some are creepy. Some are too aggressive. Some are just downright obnoxious.

Be careful that you don't become one of these people if you are considering trying to make a "love connection" on the job. These people are the reason why they intalled the "sexual harassment policies". And, it's a good idea since some people go a little TOO far and get carried away with their "romantic invitations".

Hell, one place I worked fired TWO people for sexual harassment. One was a man. One was a woman. I don't know EXACTLY happened in the case of the man except that he was saying whatever was on his mind to a sexy supervisor (that jackass). But, the woman grabbed the balls of one of the co-workers in her department. She actually "got a whole hand full of balls and all." I'm certain they were horsing around and flirting with each other. But, unlucky for her, the BIG Boss was passing by the cubicle at the same time and saw it all. Talk about poor timing...

But a lot of people toy with each other and flirt on the job like that. I've seen it. I've even seen grown men frolic and play and grope each other and hump on each other all the time on the job. I don't play that sh*t. I don't play on the job AT ALL. Strictly business. I don't do it. I don't want any guys grabbing me or trying to wrestle me or whatever. They can have it. It's funny as hell though sometimes.

I used to wonder what their wives or girlfriends might think to see 30, 40, and 50 year old men running around on the job groping their work-buddies. ??? I'd like to see the expression on both partners' faces when the woman walked in and caught him in the act. I bet the shock on the both of their faces would be funny as hell... lol. The woman would stop dead in her tracks...

"CHARLES! WHAT ARE YOU DOING???!!!"

"Uh, Uh... Baby, we're just horsin' around." hehehe.

And, people wonder why "Production" is down.

Anyway...

Let me tell you why finding love on the job is not a bad idea - if your company allows it.

For one, if two people are interested in each other and they WANT to get involved, they're going to do it - and no company policy is going to stop them. And, some of them manage to keep it a secret and work together fine with no problems whatsoever.

Some people don't believe a husband and wife should be in business together, but some of them make it work. And, they go on to establish a FAMILY business.

So, Love CAN work in the workplace but it takes two people who are understanding, rational, driven, and compatible.

When I met my Ex (She dumped me again), it was on the job. We got along very well. BUT, She was always in my department wanting to talk. She was well-known as a hard worker, smart, and she knew the production process inside and out. She had worked almost every position IN the place except management. I was new in my position. So, when she came over wanting to chit-chat, it would distract me and I'd start screwing up. That made me want her to stay away. Plus, my supervisor would always gawk when he saw her over there talking to me. He didn't know we were dating, but you know how supervisors are: The want you to work and not talk while you're on the clock. Plus, on a positive note, he wanted to make sure I was doing okay. But sometimes, when she came over, I'd screw up, and he'd come running over like the place was on fire to help get the machine unstuck. I said "Damn!" She'd be in the mix trying to help out. The machine operator would be pissed off and he'd have to come back there and help. And my poor dumbass would be running around like a chicken with my head cut off trying to figure out what the hell to do. It was embarrassing... And, it was frustrating because, for a while, I was ruining the stats almost every night. Constantly. And not getting my paperwork done. I just knew they were going to get rid of my ass. lol. So, it started to piss me off a little bit when she was always coming over to talk.

After that passed, the "jealousy bug" reared it's ugly head. If I talked to another woman or girl in that place, she'd be angry as hell and talk sh*t. She'd accuse me of flirting or say that I should avoid those girls. And, they were her so-called friends!

Then, she wanted me to quit smoking. And, she knew I smoked before we started dating.

Then, her attitude caused conflicts with a few of the other people in the workplace. She hates men especially but she had it out with a couple of the women in that place too. I thought she was wrong, but you know I couldn't say that.

Then she would take long breaks and felt like I had that option too. I was still new and only worked with one other person and we had to relieve each other for breaks and cover for each other on the machine. So, we had to do the work of two people when one of us was there. It can be done but it messes up the stats and you have move faster and walk and walk and walk back and forth to keep your eyes on both ends of the machine.

She finally, said that she couldn't take working with me anymore and changed shifts. I was happy as hell.

But, I had relationships with a few other ladies on other jobs before that - and I had no problems. Well, except for one. But, we still remained together for a few years after that and would've gotten married if I wasn't so dumb at the time.

But, let me tell you why I think most of those relationships worked and how you can possibly make yours work if you decide to get involved with someone on the job.

Again, this is solely based on my personal experiences and observations. You or someone you know may have different opinions based on your experiences, but here goes...

It could work as long as one partner doesn't expect favoritism or special treatment because you two are dating, involved, or married. When one of the partners feel they deserve special treatment because they are sleeping with "the boss", they don't work as hard and they'll come in late or think they can leave when they want or some even expect you to get rid of people THEY don't like. Or, they want to hang around in the office all the time.

It can work as long as one person is not a jealous lover or over-protective. This person will make your work-life hell. They'll confront you all the time or make you feel like you can't associate with friends or friendly co-workers who THEY feel may be a threat to the relationship. They'll try to control you at work and talk sh*t when you get home. And, you definitely don't need that in your life.

It can work as long as both partners are strong enough to push aside any advances from other people without the other partner stepping in. And the other partner must have enough trust that his or her mate can handle the situation with class and tact without causing an uproar. The person making the advances may not know that the two are involved. I gave a girl a compliment on her style one day, someone told her boyfriend and he thought I wanted his woman. He started interrogating me. And he was my supervisor! Damned Fool! But, he became one of my good friends too, so... lol. That dumbass.

It can work as long as both partners are hard workers or if at least one of the partners is well liked by managemaent. I've heard managers and supervisors talk bad about a co-worker's wife but never confronted her or attacked her simply because her husband was (probably) the hardest working person in the entire complex. It's a shame that dude died from over-working himself. No jokes intended.

It can work as long as both partners are mature enough to know to do their job and not cause strife or grief within the workplace. This situation may lead the other partner getting involved. Then, BOTH partners could be out of job and NOBODY will be able to bring home any bacon. This is also the reason why most companies don't like people getting involved at work.

It can work as long as both partner don't bring their problems from home to the workplace and spite each other or talk about their problems with each other to other co-workers. This will turn the co-workers against the "bad guy" or girl and cause drama for a while. And it might even help cause a break-up. That happened to me. Those chickenheaded hoodrat girls even tried to hook my girl up with some pretty-boy friend of theirs. That really ticked me off. But, as I said, we stayed together for years after that incident.

It can work as long as the partners are honest, committed to each other, devoted, and no one is playing games or flirting with other people. If you decide to date someone on the job, make sure the person you're interested in is not a tease, promiscuous, or someone who loves to flirt with every pretty face he or she sees. That sh*t will drive you crazy. I've seen this happen on the job before and it turned into a love triangle that caused two people to get fired.

It can work if the partners work in different departments.

Sometimes working different shifts has it's drawbacks because you know you won't see much of each other except on days off or for a few hours each day - this can lead to loneliness for one of the partners.

If the job doesn't pay much money for either partner, this can be drawback also since money IS one of the primary causes of unhappiness in a relationship.

It can work as long as neither partner abuses the business or neglects the business. If one of the partners is really trying while the other is spending money and bullsh*ttin', this is definitely going to lead to trouble and probably the downfall of the business.

It can work as long as both partners have the same goals and want to work hard to achieve long-term goals and promote the growth of the business.

It can work as long as both partners communicate decisions and events (like negotiations) and keep each other in the know. Like any business or relationship between equal partners, each partner should keep the other partner informed.

It can work as long as both partners understand their strengths and weaknesses, each other's strenths and weaknesses, and are able to allow each other to use their strengths to help build the business.

It can work as long as the partners aren't jealous of each other or each other's talents, skills, or connections and allow each other to use their resources to help grow the business.

It can work as long as neither partner lets his or her ego cause him or her to abuse him or herself, the other partner, the business, or the customers.

Now, I know what you may be thinking.

This may sound like a lot of preaching or coaching, but if you're thinking about hooking up with someone on the job, but you're having doubts, I say: "Don't hold back! Go for it!"

Just be sure that you can handle that situation and that you're not the jealous type. Be sure you're hooking up with someone that doesn't cause a lot of drama or someone who may be a player.

Take your time and get to know the person as a friend first and see what happens from there.

- loveqna